Great (Ahem) Low Expectations
My goal to end 2021 is to somehow miraculously pair rest and quiet with what some would argue is the busiest time of year. How, you may ask, did I come to make this my goal to achieve over the next few weeks?
It all started with a “quick, easy getaway” before Thanksgiving. We rented an adorable cottage for a long weekend and although we had great moments, it was not the overall restful break I was envisioning. Even to go away for a brief three nights with my husband, two kids, and dog requires a pretty extensive packing list to check off. Add to that we were going to a location that was fairly remote so the pressure was on to make sure we had “all the things”. But I thought to myself, “It’ll be worth it when we get there, this will be great.”
I will save you the gritty details but will share this summary: bunk beds are not all they're cracked up to be; the blurred lines of work and home as a result of the pandemic continues to make it difficult to truly be “out of office” (in this case it was my husband’s job); and somehow kids just have this uncanny way of getting hurt when you are far from home (nothing serious thank goodness). These and a few other mishaps resulted in me feeling tired and cranky…which is no fun for anyone.
So here is what I learned: we are apparently NOT a “quick, easy getaway” family...not yet anyway. And that is ok! We seem to do much better with a full week to acclimate to a new environment and get into a rhythm. Also my expectations for this trip were way too high. I was looking for this time away to be restful and to reconnect and it just wasn’t, which left me feeling disappointed. The tranquility of the mountains did not translate to tranquility inside the cottage in the mountains via osmosis. I was craving a slower pace and time with my people so badly that....I sort of forgot who me and my people can be when we are away from home.
However, we are now approaching winter break. A full week of no school and some time off for my husband and I from work. During this time I am planning to plug in quiet and reconnection by setting up days when we are all home for open time together, but it will be easier because we are in our own environment. Also, if I want to get the peace and quiet I am craving I have to clearly and directly ask for help to make it happen--whether that means planning with my husband to have a few hours alone to read my book uninterrupted and/or ordering take out for a few nights so we don’t have to cook and clean. I need to remember to keep expectations low...and maybe I will be pleasantly surprised? For more on this topic on how to create a restful holiday you can listen to a podcast I love (Edit Your Life) with an episode literally titled “Restful Holiday Ideas”. I listened just as I was outlining this blog post and the hosts, Chrsitine and Asha, really identified what I am looking for this holiday season. (Shameless plug--we have 3 episodes of our Parent to Parent Podcast up and our holiday episode is out Dec. 20th--have a listen while you are wrapping gifts, cooking/baking, cleaning before/after a gathering, or on a walk solo!)
I hope you and your family find some rest and reconnection this holiday season and I wish you safe and healthy holidays and a happy new year!